Strange Things are Afoot at the Circle K.: VROOOOOOOMMMM!

Friday, October 01, 2004


Wow, I feel absolutely fantastic tonight, and in fact, all day long. It can't be the lexapro already, it must just be a placebo effect or something, but I've been very happy all day, and getting more and more hyper as the day goes on. In fact, I feel so good, it's time for something I haven't done in a long time, but used to do all the time: write a really really long post! Aren't you lucky.

Where to start? Yesterday, I guess. I didn't do much yesterday, I was off so I just sat around the house most of the day, but then when I went to return Prince of Persia, I decided to buy some movies. Movie Gallery is having a sale, buy two used games or movie and get two free. And the VHS are only $5.99. Even though I hate VHS I decided to buy some anyway. I could barely find four I wanted though. The only one I really wanted was Dagon, which is a horror movie based on a couple of H.P. Lovecraft's stories. Now there were lots of horrible B-movies based on his stories made in the 70's and 80's, but this one was made in 2001, and from what I hear, is actually really good. I've never seen it yet. Then I noticed they also had Alien for sale. I'd been wanting to rent that anyway, so I just bought it. I'd never seen it, can you believe that? I wish now I hadn't bought it, I didn't like it. Well, I liked it, it was ok, but it was kinda boring. Especially the first 45 minutes or so. I also got Born in East L.A., which I've seen many times anyway, and Bicentennial Man. Bicentennial Man is one of the greatest movies ever. This was only the second time I've seen it. The first time I saw it, it actually made me cry. Which actually isn't that hard, movies, and even music, make me cry on a fairly regular basis. Well, not really cry usually, but bring a tear or two to my eyes. Anyway, it's a great movie, and you should see it if you haven't.

Sadly, I found tonight, that two of the movies don't work. And, wouldn't you know it, one of them is Dagon. The other is Born in East L.A. I don't know if they'll take them back either, because already threw some of the packaging away. For some reason when you buy the movies, they give you the original movie box, plus the plastic box that they keep the movie in, and has all their serial numbers and stuff like that on them. I threw those away, and just kept the original boxes.

Today at work was very busy. Very very busy. One of the busiest days we've had in months. It was also fun though, because I was in a really good mood, and several interesting things happened. First there was a lady that needed to button her shirt. Not that I'm complaining, but it was embarrassing, especially because at first I wasn't entirely sure if she knew it needed buttoning, it turns out she did. Because I saw her look down and she didn't seem surprised or anything, and still didn't button it up. Her shirt was unbuttoned about halfway down. She was wearing a bra, or a bra-like object, but it could barely contain her breasts.. It was great. The shirt was still closed at the top, or appeared that way, and that's why at first I thought just one or two buttons had accidentally come undone, but then I noticed that the top button wasn't buttoned, the shirt was just pulled semi-closed at the top and appeared that way. She seemed to be making a great effort to expose her breasts. I did the best I could to pretend like I didn't notice though.

Then later, a guy came through with a pink poodle. Yes, a pink poodle, no one at work believe me either until they saw it themselves. It was a poodle, and it was dyed hot-pink. It was cool. I was like "This guy's got a pink poodle!", and Michelle said "Bullshit," and I said "Come look for yourself if you don't believe me. So she did. Half the employees were all standing around in the drive through staring at this guy and his poodle. He didn't say anything about it though. Someone said "What kind of GUY has a pink poodle?" It was very friendly too, it was standing in the window wagging its tail at me.

The best part of the work day was when I disgusted Michelle. I don't know why she thought it was disgusting, everyone else thinks it's weird, but really funny. Part of the local newspaper was over in drive through all morning, and one of the headlines was about a pig contest. For all you city slickers out there, that's where people who raise pigs bring their best pigs, and they get judged on a variety of points. Like a dog show. I hope no one actually needed this explanation, but you never know. So anyway, I went over to Michelle and Murray and said, "I wish I was the judge in a pig contest. I'd have a swimsuit competition!" They both laughed a lot. That's not what grossed Michelle out, what did that was a few minutes later, I walked back over there and said "But wait, pigs have 8 nipples, they'd have to wear four bikini tops!" For some reason that really grossed Michelle out, and all I had to do the rest of the day was even just mention pigs, and she'd get disgusted. I'd really like to see that, a pig in a bikini. Shawn said he would too. What would you do with all the left over bikini bottoms though? You could give them to some women you know, and say, "Sorry, that's all they had, guess you'll just have to go topless." That would be great.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. After the pink poodle left, I began singing the pink poodle song, which I just made up on the spur of the moment. It goes, "Pink Poodle! Piiiiiiiink Poodle..." and etc and etc. Kinda like when I was sitting in my car, and the squirrel ran across the fence in front of me, and then leaped onto a tree, and I sang the "Yay, squirrel!" song as it did so. As it ran down the fence I went "Squirrel, squirrel squirrel," and as it leaped to the tree I yelled, "YAY!"

Then I came home and paid my rent, and had a talk with the nice new landlady about some work that needs to be done to my apartment, but how I never call the maintenance guy because he always breaks more than he fixes. It would seem she hears that complaint a lot. I told her about the time he was trying to fix my toilet, and broke the tank in half. She said she'll have him come over and look at some of the stuff sometime soon, and she'll come with him, to make sure he doesn't break anything. Then I got dinner at Sonic. Then I came home and watched Bicentennial Man, which put me in an even better mood than I already was in. And now here I am. YAY!

Ok, I think that's it for now. This post ended up not being quite as long as I expected, but it's still pretty big. Wow, that sounded dirty. Or at least it did to me, but I'm a pervert.

Oh wait! That reminds me of something else that happened at work I had almost forgotten about. Some woman came through drive through and she looked like a crack whore. I mentioned this to several of the employees, and most of them agreed. I was telling Michelle, and I also said "And she's got either lipstick or blood smeared all over her chin." And Michelle went and snuck a peek and said something about, she does, maybe she really is a crack whore. I said "Yeah, maybe she's been doing unspeakable things to guys, and smeared her lipstick." Michelle thought that was gross too. I was laughing like a maniac the whole day at work today.

Today was a great day. I can think of only a few things that could have made it better, but I'm not going to say it, because it's dirty. So very dirty.