Strange Things are Afoot at the Circle K.: Somebody's Baking Brownies...

Sunday, October 03, 2004

Somebody's Baking Brownies...

I am so fucking bored right now.

I baked some brownies the other night. They actually turned out good, even though there were three things working against them:

1. I've never baked brownies, or a cake, or anything like that before.
2. I messed up.
3. My oven is a piece of shit.

Actually, because of #3, it turned out that #2 was a good thing. Let me explain. I went to the store and bought a pack of Betty Crocker brownie mix. I did not realize that one pack would not be enough for my cake pan. So when I was mixing it up, I was like, "Uh oh, this isn't making shit, it's not even gonna cover the bottom, I'll probably end up having to throw out the whole mess." But I went on anyway. I poured it into the cake pan, and it just barely covered the bottom, I had to tilt the pan around to get it to cover the whole bottom.

My oven is a piece of shit. It has been ever since I moved in. I quickly learned that I needed to set the temperature 25 to 50 degrees higher than what the directions or recipe called for, and cook it much longer, sometimes up to twice as long, depending on what's being cooked. Also, it doesn't matter how long I cook stuff, the bottom never cooks, which is really weird since the heat comes from the bottom heating element. For example, whenever I cook a pizza, I can leave it in there until the cheese on top is starting to turn brown and crunchy, but the crust on bottom will still be completely raw.

But since these brownies were a paper-thin layer, I decided to leave the temperature setting at recommended setting, and figured it would only take them a few minutes to cook. It still took over half an hour. I almost left them in too long though, the top was just about to start getting hard, but, the bottom was barely done. If I had actually cooked two packages the bottom wouldn't have cooked at all, so it was a good thing I made too little.

In an attempt to remedy the pizza problem, I got one of those special pizza pans with the holes on bottom that are supposed to cook frozen pizza crusts better. I thought maybe this would let the bottom actually cook. I just tried, I just took the pizza out of the oven while writing the first half of this post. It didn't work. It helped a tiny bit. The crust isn't completely raw, but it's still pretty soggy.

I wish I knew what was wrong with my oven.