Strange Things are Afoot at the Circle K.

Thursday, September 12, 2002

So, I'm sitting here eating a Maruchan Instant Lunch noodle cup thing, and the John Candy movie "Canadian Bacon" is playing on HBO. An interesting movie, I'd heard of it before but didn't know what it was about. Ok, so Alan Alda is the president, and his popularity rating is going down and they decide to try to start the cold war back up again to help his ratings. But Russia doesn't want to because it was the cold war spending that put their country in the condition it's in today. So America has to look elsewhere for an enemy. They go through all their old lists and all the old enemies are dead. One interesting comment, interesting especially since this is the day after the anniversary of the Sept. 11th attacks, is that the president suggests international terrorists as their new enemy, and the Defense Secretary says something along the lines of, "Are you kidding? We're not going to start missle production and everything back up just to combat a few guys with exploding cars." So eventually they decide to start a war with Canada, after there's a news report on TV about John Candy's character starting a Canadian vs. American riot after he commented that "Canadian beer sure does suck."

My noodle cup is finally cool enough to eat. Yum, I love these things. Alicia is obsessed with Ramen, I like Ramen too, but I think I like these things better. Anyway, back to the movie.

This movie reminds me of the South Park movie, with its war on Canada. It uses some similar jokes. They keep saying stuff like, "Canada isn't even a real country, it's more like the 51st state." And at one point they start showing Anti-Canada propaganda on TV to make people hate the Canadians. One of the news reporters says, "Imagine your children pledging allegiance to the maple leaf, mayonnaise on everything, winter 11 months a year, and Anne Murray all day."

I missed the middle of the movie. I saw the beginning, and the last 20 minutes or so, but during the middle I went to the store to buy these noodle cups. I wish I would have seen all of it, it looked very interesting, and, despite being a comedy, it was also political, which is another good point.

Oh cool, now Hamtaro is on Cartoon Network, I love this show. I love almost all Japanese cartoons. Hmmm, from politics to Hamtaro. I have a hamster, it looks kinda like Hamtaro. It's name is Harvey, even though it's a female. I named her after Weird Al's "Harvey the Wonder Hamster." I seldom call her Harvey, though. I call her something different almost everytime I see her. There's Harvey, Harvard, Harvmeister, and one of my favorites, Dr. Harvalonious. Lately I usually call her Harvard, which my mom started, she calls her "Harvard, the world's only college educated hamster." My mom's pretty weird too.

Warning, Warning. Strange weapons are approaching!

In other movie news my order from Amazon.com came in a couple of days ago. "Silence of the Hams." That's one of my favorite movies, but it's hard to find arround here. I've never seen a copy of it for sale. I got a used copy of it off Amazon.com for about $13 with shipping and handling.

If you've never seen this movie, you should. Especially if you're a fan of Airplane and the Leslie Neilsen movies and things like that. This movie, written, directed, and also acted in by Ezzio Greggio, is a very strange, wacky parody. It's more of a parody of "Psycho" than "Silence of the Lambs." It features Dom DeLuise as Dr. Animal the Cannibal Pizza, and Billy Zane as FBI agent Jo Dee Fostar. Jo Dee Fostar is trying to get Dr. Animal to tell him where to find the psycho killer, who he thinks killed his girlfriend, who, like in Psycho, stole money from her boss and ended up at a Motel and was killed in the shower.

It's hard to pick a favorite scene, but I think it would be the scene where Jo is talking to Dr. Animal and Dr. Animal says "Tell me Clair-ass, what is your most disturbing, decadent, depraved, defoliated, decotaged, deformed, dried, dream?" And Jo sobs and says, "Ham." And Dr. Animal says, "Was the ham...silent?" And Jo starts crying, and Animal continues, "Ham can be very quiet. Very quiet. Unless it's falling down the stairs. Then it goes boom boom boom-ti-boom bum bam. Celery can be very loud. Apples, louder. Unless you have apple sauce...which goes very well with ham." And Jo sobs, "Stop! Please, no more questions!"

I'm cracking up just thinking about it.

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